Just think what you could do with the confidence and skills to present well in public. I believe there is a disproportionate amount of credibility given to those that can speak well in public. This is a massive positive if you’re good that is! In other words when we see a great presenter we look at them in a very positive light and bestow them with compliments beyond their oratory skills.

Compare this with someone who has the same knowledge and mastery of the subject but is not able to articulate and communicate with the same skill. We start to question their credibility, disengage and are less inclined to follow through on the presenters recommendations. Such a shame, seems so unfair!

Public Speaking is a fantastic life skill. I am here to help you develop it. Ask me whatever you like and I will do my best to provide you with a valuable answer.

Public Speaking is not difficult. We make it difficult by not being equipped with the right strategies to look feel and sound great.

Look forward to hearing from you soon.

This has to be one of the most common things I hear as a Public Speaking coach “I just lose all my confidence the minute I stand up” yeah and your brain sits down I know! No seriously, it’s a big challenge for even experienced speakers to maintain a confident state.

I like to ask “so, where did you put it? I mean were you confident of standing up at least, tying your shoelaces, making breakfast this morning?”

Of course you were, you haven’t lost all your confidence you’re just are not in a confident state in that precise moment in time.
What I like to help people become aware of is what they are doing not to be confident as they think about speaking in public. I once asked this guy to teach me how to lose my confidence in front of an audience, since he was so practiced at it I figured he would have all the answers.

And he did! In 5 easy steps.

Step one: Have a low self-esteem, therefore, think that everyone is not going to care what you have to say, what you have achieved etc. Also, feel that people in the audience will be judging your physical appearance, and anything less than Brad Pitt will be mocked and ridiculed.

Step two: Worry more about how you say it, as opposed to what you say. In particular, look for times where you are struggling for breath, shaking, losing the tonality in your voice, and as soon as you detect this, panic. This will cause a vicious circle, and before you know it, you will be ready to pass out.

Step three: You must feel that everyone in the audience is judging you, if you stutter, feel like they will notice it, heck, feel like it will change their opinions of you forever.

Step four: Play in your mind a visualisation of what could go wrong. Also, visualise and really feel the fear, play this over and over until it becomes a reality.

Step five: Place critical importance on how others perceive you. Remember, it is not who you are, what you have achieved nor the success you have built-up, it is the opinions of others that matters most.

Wow, I thought, that should do it!

He gained a lot by this insight into what he was doing to loose his confidence. Awareness itself can be curative. It was obvious to him that if he could learn to gradually reverse each of the 5 steps he could start to take control and pretty soon would be looking forward to the opportunity to share his views and wisdom with the world.

So, next time you think you are not confident become aware of what you are doing in your mind to create the feelings you don’t really want.

You can be amazed at the progress you will make.

More another time on how to maintain confidence, irrespective of your environment

Happy Presenting

Martin

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=QxCH3kBjZBA

For me however,there is a huge difference between common sense and common practice. In fact I would even go as far to say that common sense is in fact most often un-common practice.

For example we know it makes sense to exercise at least 3 times a week, eat healthy food, save money, plan for success, keep to the speed limits, the list is endless. These are on the easy list and we are not even doing them! Make sense yes but can be uncommon. As the great personal development guru Jim Rohn would say “easy to do, easy not to do”

So what ‘uncommon’ sense habits will you adopt for 2009? Life is accumulative. Start your year by harvesting the rewards of making common sense common practice.

You know it makes sense!

Take action now

Martin

I was talking to him about all the reasons why I hadn’t taken a leap of faith in a project that I had been promising myself for some time. I said I didn’t really think I was up to it. He said “well Martin what are you pretending not to know, to know this?” I seemed to disappear in my own head for what seemed an eternity and then the answer came loud and clear; I am already good enough and I have everything I need within me right now to take on the challenge of this project.

As quick as a flash the next question came “Ok then, so what is the payoff for you pretending to yourself, you are not up to it?” I said, feeling slighty awkard but strangely enlightened “It keeps me from having to face the fear of failing” to which he replied “And what do you get from doing this, what does it give you?”

I thought for a moment what a weird question! I mean why would I gain from doing something i didn’t want to do. The answer for me, has been the same answer that so many others I have asked, have given me, it keeps me safe and cocooned away from hurt or what ever negative emotion we are trying to avoid feeling.

So the lesson to me that day is that there is always a positive gain from trying to avoid facing our fears and in doing so our mind tricks us into feeling too good too quickly and yet again successfuly steals of us from taking action towards our goals and aspirations.

As you think about the year ahead and plan your goals be aware that you are not limiting yourself by pretending not to be good enough. Remember fears come as an instuction not an obstruction. They are the body’s natural alert system that is gently letting you know you might want to pay attention and spend some time getting prepared for the task ahead!

You could go the other way and just pretend to be better than you think you are, wonder where that would take you? All the way probably…to achieving the best life possible.

Best Wishes for a Happy, Peaceful and Super Successful 2009.

Martin

As a practical tool use these questions if you ever find yourself avoiding taking action. Even if they appear stange at first, go for it they work!

1.What am I pretending not to know?”
2.What is the payoff for you pretending to…(answer to question 1)
3.What do you gain from doing/believing this, what does it give you?
4.What would be a more empowering belief to have that would allow you to take action, now.

Mark Victor Hansen gives an excellent account of himself in this “interesting” discussion

Of course Personal Development is NOT a Scam - but of course some people will want to say it is. Don’t say I don’t give a fair representation of the facts here

One of my favourite Leadership Authors - I hope you enjoy